Forgivness Meditation

Today in class, we did a forgiving meditation. Which when I heard that it did not sound good to me; two things that I’m not good at, the first being forgiving, and the other meditation. I found that this meditation exercise had the opposite effect, instead of forgiving, it made me more hostile remembering unpleasant old memories. As the video continued, I found myself growing even more mad with each suggestion the speaker made, as I tend to hold grudges, a lot. I did not want to forgive anyone, that is not who I am, I hold grudges and don’t give second chances, I am still mad about past situations and not ready to forgive, so when the speaker told me to forgive them, I then became mad at him as well. This meditation exercise did not seem to help me, at all.